You Shouldn't Say "Crazy".

Day 2

My wife and I have had some of the best conversations in the last two weeks. Ever since the "Morning of the Orange" (more about that later), we have discussed every aspect of our marriage with a new openness and honesty. You'd like Leslie, she is the sweetest, most loyal, most helpful, most loving person on earth. Honestly, I feel badly for every other man who had to marry less.

Anyway, in one of our conversations recently, she fussed at me for using the term, "crazy" to describe myself (non-OCD folks really struggle with the whole self-loathing thing). "People will think you're belittling them, and they'll be offended." She helps me think, see, and hear, through the brains, eyes, and ears of others, because I'm so busy trying to sort out all of the rogue thoughts marauding through my own brain. And I do see her point.

So, let me first declare that neither the title of this blog nor any of it's posts are meant to offend anyone. Now, I'll tell you why I say, "crazy". Have you ever seen the movie What About Bob? In the film, Bill Murray is afraid that he may have Tourets Syndrome, so he occasionally shouts obscenities on purpose. The rationale is that, if he were shouting them involuntarily, he may have Turrets Syndrome, so, as long as he is doing it on purpose, he knows he doesen't have the disease.

I know that I'm not crazy (at least not any crazier than I have ever been or than most people are). I use the term to lessen the severity of the situation. "Crazy" is a word we use when we speak of something that is absurd or rediculous. Words like "obsessive" and "compulsive" are scary words that denote real and debilitating things. I would much rather think of the madness I live everyday as absurd. Believe me, no one understands the very real pain of OCD more than me, and anyone out there struggling with this junk has my deepest empathy. Saying "crazy" just helps me to deal with it. Thanks for understanding.